Marriage And Relationship Counselling
My approach to relationship counselling is founded upon 'The Gottman Method of Couples Therapy'.
Dr. John Gottman's research began in the 1970's and continues to this day and is concerned with what makes marriages succeed and fail.
The Gottman Method acknowledges that all relationships get into difficulties at times so what's important is how we work throughand recover from these difficulties when they arise. Furthermore, he suggests that the foundation of a good relationship is the quality basic friendship that exists between the two individuals, and so one of the core aims of therapy is to strengthen the couple's understanding and appreciation of one another, and to help them find ways of negotiating through their differences without getting caught up in dialogues about who is right and who is wrong.
How it works:
The Gottman approach consists of five parts:
- Assessment
- Treatment
- Homework
- Termination
- Outcome evaluation
In the first session we will talk about the history of your relationship, areas of concern, and the goals of treatment.
In the next sessions, I will meet with each of you individually to learn something of your personal histories and to give each of you an opportunity to share thoughts, feelings and perceptions. Then in the final assessment session, I will share with you some of my recommendations for treatment, and help you to define mutually agreed upon goals for therapy.
Most of the work will involve sessions in which you will be seen together as a couple. However, there may be times when individual sessions are recommended.
The length of therapy (typically between eight and sixteen sessions) will be determined by your specific needs and goals.
During the course of therapy, we will establish points at which you evaluate your satisfaction with progress and I will also encourage you to raise any questions or concerns that you have about how the work is progressing whenever they occur to you.
In the later stages of therapy we will phase out, or meet less frequently, in order for you to test out new relationship skills and prepare for termination.
Although you may terminate therapy at any time, it is most helpful to have at least one session together to summarize progress, define the work that remains, and say good-bye.
Finally, in the outcome-evaluation phase, as per the Gottman Method, four follow-up sessions are recommended: after six-months, 12 months, 18 months and two years. These sessions have been shown through research to significantly decrease the chances of relapse into previous, unhelpful patterns.